Tuesday, September 9, 2008

My Story- 100th post

This my 100th post. Wow! I wanted to say Thank You to all of you. Those who leave wonderful comments full of love, kindness, warmth and fun; and, all my silent readers who rather just read than comment. I still feel your love as well.

Swanofdreamers was born out of my personal chaos. I just broken up with my fiancee, Anakin, (that is not his real name but what I call him sometimes). Yes, he did sometimes call me Padme. :) After the breakup, a tidal wave of creativity poured out for both of us. A tremendous amount of energy was spent on trying to make our relationship work. Energy that was needed elsewhere in both of our lives. I was at the point that it was hard for me to go audition or send out my headshots for acting work. This isn't Anakin's fault or mine, it just happened.

Once Anakin and I parted, our creative lives blossomed. This isn't to say there wasn't broken hearts or tears. Of course, there was. Sometimes the best choices for us is the hardest to do. Swanofdreamers became my refuge from all the drama and hurt in my personal life. With each new post, my life started to flower again. I see clearly that the output of creativity is linked to our lives. If your feeling like you can't create, blocked or have no courage to do the next step. Just look at what's going on in your life. Because if we are unhappy or sad in our personal lives it is going to be challenging to go audition, paint your sketch, bake a new recipe or write lyrics for your music.

I've learned to be more balanced in my life. To keep my creative energy flowing. To not sacrifice my personal energy on situations or people that I need to let go of. Anakin and I are still good friends now. That is a testament to our bond. There are times when the past rises up and I'm sad for what is lost. I remind myself of all the wonderful things I have gained. I have this place I carved out where I can share my creative life with all of you out there. In turn, you have all shared your creative lives with me. I am grateful for that honor. I say Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

PS. I sometimes forget not everyone is a Star Wars fan like me. Anakin and Padme are the lovers from the Star Wars prequels (Episodes 1-3).


Sacred Suzie said...

Congratulations Shell! That's a milestone indeed and even though the blog blossomed out of an ending, it sounds like it was for the best...for all of us! Now us readers get to know more about you and read your inspiring words and stories.

There is nothing worse than a not-working relationship to suck the creative life out of you, even when people are nice and caring. I'm glad that you are doing so great!

Susie said...

Congratulations with your 100th post!! What an accomplishment! It has been really liberating for me too. I fell like I am in line with what I was supposed to do. Unfortunately, I found it at the end of a long road of pain but I am here now. I wouldn't have gotten here without going through that.

Diana Cornielle said...

Congratulations on your 100th post!

Life is tough, but I believe we need to learn from it. We learn from every single thing in life. Our decisions, accomplishments, our failures and our triumphs. Things happen for a reason! We grow and mature every time with every situation, weather good or bad. It seems to me like you have a good attitude, good luck to you. Happy Wednesday!

mermaid musings said...

1ooth post!!!
My heart was broken too. I understand what are you talking about my dear mermaid friend.
We will find love again for now let's enjoy our creativity and our single life, oh yes!!!

Shell said...

Thanks ladies for coming to share my 100th post. It is true after challenges sometimes you get rewarded with a new and better life for yourself.
Carmen, I am seeing somebody now. An unexpected yet happy turn in my lfie.

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