Balloons

I woke up this morning to actually feel like I can smile at the blue sky and the sun. My new motto or mantra of Embrace and Endure is going to help me in the days and weeks ahead in a big way.

Now, why do I have Balloons here? Balloons always make me happy. There is something cheery and light about them. Whenever I see someone with a whole bunch of balloons, I always want to ask them if I can have one.



Of course, these days I like to have the pink balloon to walk around with.
When I see balloons flying high in the sky, I wonder where they are going to end up?

What makes you happy at first glance? If you see balloons today especially a pink one, I hope you think of me.

I know this is sweet fluffy post. Today, I'm in that kind of mood. As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Embrace and Endure

By nature, I'm optimist. I have always been this way. I have been struggling, fellow dreamers. I feel like Luke fighting Vader in The Empire Strikes Back: battered and beaten.

The most recent events in my life are threatening to erode my spirit. I have tried my best to keep afloat. It has been challenging. Today, I had a heart to heart talk with Neo. He always brings me back to my center. What stuck out most is this: I have to embrace all these feelings to heal and endure this difficult time right now.

If you come to Swanofdreamers and think wow, Shell appears happy and positive all the time. Just know there are days when I have to work extra hard to stay positive. Trying to maintain my hope with the Dark Side creeping in is challenging. If your reading this and your struggling too in whatever form, know you are not alone. I'm right with you.

So if your weary, had it up to here, can't take it anymore, about to give up, all I can say is this. Embrace all these feelings even the most painful ones. Then find a way to endure whatever difficulty your having. Follow your fascinations or talk to a trusted friend. Get up for a morning walks or evening runs. Whatever you can do to keep sane and keep going. Do it! One day, I promise you the sun will rise and you'll wake up feeling free. I don't know when the day will come. It will.

If life is good for you right now. Know that I'm happy for you. Revel in what delights you and share all your juicy goodness with others.


As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Dreamthought #10: Follow your Fascinations

"We are all creative and original--we just need to release our flow. What ideas, colors, people, concepts, lifestyles, etc. captivate you? Where is your energy naturally drawn? Keep a fascination list for a month and it will provide you with invaluable clues to your purpose."

My recent fascinations:

1) The color Pink.
2) Reading Manga and Graphic Novels.
3) Writing a poem a day.
4) Imaging ways to live in Paris for a month or two.
5) Learning my new Queen Margaret monologue

What are you fascinated with?

New Moon on Thursday

Tonight is the New Moon in Aries. The New Moon is a perfect time to start anew. You have the benefit of passionate, courageous and joyful Aries energy to aid you in your new adventure. What will it be my fellow Dreamers? It can be as big or a small as you wish it to be. The time to start is now! Why now? I say Why not now!

Here is something else to get the passion stirred. This is going out to all my fellow single people. If your with someone you can appreciate this too. This is one of my favorite songs from back in the day. Here is Diana Ross singing Muscles




As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Fun and Random facts about Me

Hi everyone. My mom is still taking baby steps with being online. I'm hoping to get her signed up with an e-mail address by week's end. It's Wednesday, I feel it's time for more Random facts about me!

1) I've been drawn to the color Pink for Spring.


2) I'm enjoying the freedom of being single; I can take time to get clear on the type of man I want to attract in my life.

3) I'm craving to read Jane Eyre, so I can return to Thornfield Hall with Jane and Mr. Rochester.

4) I have to find out when Toshi Kubota is performing in NYC, so I can see him perform live. He's a soulful Japanese man.

5) I also want to get this CD again. I lost it when my computer crashed. Along with music from the tv show, Ron Perlman is reading poetry as Vincent. It is beautiful. Always get me in a dreamy and romantic state of mind.

I hope everyone is having a wonderful day. It's time to go out and get into an adventure or two. I'll be back tomorrow. As always, sweet dreams to you all.

Happy Monday

Happy Monday. I see I have some people ready to be dangerous and dream with their eyes open!! Spring is the perfect time to shake things up and live boldly!! If you have no idea what I'm talking about, read the post from Sunday.

I've noticed the buds on the trees are staring to appear. I'm excited it is Spring. Unfortunately, it 26 degrees here in New York!! Hey, the sun is shining. Just have to be patient, right?

Going to my mom's today. She is going to be connected to the internet for the first time!! Look out internet here comes my Mom. I also have been surfing in creative worlds with Neo. We have been hanging tight recently. It has been really great for me. He comforts me and inspires my flights of imagination. (Gosh I hope that doesn't sound corny.) Especially with all I have been going through, I am glad he's back in my life. He makes me feel that I can do anything I put my mind to which is why I call him Neo.

I must now venture into the Spring cold afternoon. Spring and cold should not even be in the same breathe. Take care everyone. As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Dream Thought #9 - Who is ready to be Dangerous?

"All people dream, but not all equally. Those who dream by night,in the dusty recesses of their minds,wake to find it was all vanity. But the dreamers of the day are dangerous, for they may act their dreams with open eyes and make things happen."- T.E. Lawrence

Spending Spring with Jane

Though the sun is playing peek-a-boo today, I'm still happy that Spring is officially here! This winter has been brutal for me literally and personally. Goodbye, Winter. Hello, SPRING!!!

Big hugs to all of you for your generous words on my video! The next one will be me reading poetry. Look for it next week. I will try my best to make it interesting and not a snooze fest.

Yesterday, I finished reading Sense and Sensibility which I enjoyed. It was so good. Can I tell you how much I loved Colonel Brandon!! He is my favorite man in the whole book. Edward is sweet and as for Willougby.. I have know a man or two like that in my lifetime. (Which I'm not sure is good or bad.) I must confess when I was younger I was like Marianne in the way I viewed love. I have matured quite nicely. I do adore the 1995 S&S starring Emma Thompson and Kate Winslet. While I was reading, scenes from the movie rose up from my memory. Emma deserved the Oscar she won for best screenplay. Yes, Emma was considerably older than Elinor in the book. Still, I feel she captured Elinor's essence. I did miss the recent pbs version of S&S. I'm sure I'll be able to rent it soon. Now, I need advice. What is the next book by Jane Austen should I read? Is there any order to read them in?

Along with spending Spring with Jane, I'm also committing energy to my one woman show project. I've always wanted to do a one woman show since I saw Whoopi's show on HBO back in the day. I may have stumbled on a great idea to do one. I feel I'm mature enough to see it through it now. There is a never dull moment over here at Swanofdreamers! I always have creative ideas and projects that I'm working on in one form or another. I'm sure I'm not the only one like this.

Enjoy the first Friday of Spring wherever you are. As always, Sweet Dreams

PS. I do think it's interesting that Emma married Greg Wise(who played Willoughby in S&S) and they have a child together.

My first video

Here it is. Me live and in person. I'm using my crystal eye webcam which is on my laptop. Time to explore and expand my horizons.

Loving Nat

Wishing all of you to find your own very pot o' gold on this St. Patrick's Day.


Today, I found out it is Nat "King" Cole's birthday! When I was about 16, my mom got a 4 record album (Vinyl) set of Nat King Cole. She started playing his music and I fell in love with him. His voice is beauty to me: Rich and Deep. As well as being a talented vocalist, he was also a wonderful Jazz pianist.

Nat for me defined elegance, style and class; He also has the honor of being the first African American to have his own variety show: The Nat King Cole show in the late 50's. Nat's legacy lives on not only in his children including his daughter Natalie Cole but his vast amount of music he has left behind. In honor of what would have been his 90th birthday, I'm posting two videos of him. If you don't him, please check him out. He is worth getting to know. There is only one Nat "King" Cole. There will be never be another like him.
Here is one of my favorites: Pretend.




Nat singing Let There Be Love.



I love you Nat! As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

In a Swan state of mind

Sunday morning, I got up to find a wonderful comment from Poetic Dreams that she had something over at her blog. She made tags for me. To say I was delighted is too tame. You are the best Poetic Dreams.

The header above and these two below are my new custom made tags.

This is sweet.


This is elegant.


The generosity and creativity of my fellow bloggers amazes me time and time again. Do you like these tags? Go on over to Poetic Dreams' place and she love to make tags just for you.

Ironically, when I was a kid. I never really liked my last name. When I hit the teens, I found my last name made me unique since Michelle is a popular name. As an actor, I get asked all the time. Is that your real name? Yes, it is I always say proudly.

I found cool facts associated with my namesake that I didn't know.

The Swan is the bird of the Muses.
Aphrodite's chariot was drawn by Swans.
My old friend William Shakespeare was called "The Swan of Avon".

I'm about all Swaned out. Yes, I know that's not a real word. Hey, I'm sure I can make up a word or two on my own blog. I hope everyone has a wonderful Monday. As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Beauty and Magic

You know this is the second Friday 13th in a row! I believe magic is afoot. On a day like this anything can happen. Did you know that Friday was named after the Norse goddess,Freya. She is the goddess of Love and Beauty. This beautiful woman is from one of my Essence magazines; She evokes a timeless beauty that I feel is in the spirit of Freya.

I use to write little snippets with a meditative feel. I think I'm going to go back and write more. They were fun for me to do. I had shared another snippet last month. Here is another one for you.

Clear blue sky with wisps of clouds sail above me. The daystar is shining her rays down upon me. My bare feet touch the pure white sands. My sarong of small pink, red, yellow flowers with my red bathing suit feel weightless on my skin. A light breeze from the west rolls in. I look toward the mighty ocean with her sparkling blue waters with white bubbles rolling on the sand. I come close to the edge of the water. I look around. I take of my sarong and go off running into the big blue.The water is delicious on my skin. Cool and soft all at once. I float on my back with my face toward the sun....

A magical boost for love and beauty is this dandy affirmation. Look in the mirror and say this: "I am a beautiful person" and "I radiate with love." I guarantee you after you say this 10 to 15 times to yourself you'll actually begin to sparkle. When sunset comes, light pink or red candles. Their colors vibrate with beauty and love.

Have a wonderful Friday. As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Expression!

After I posted yesterday, I allowed myself to sink into my feelings. I finished Henry VI trilogy by my old friend, Shakespeare and continued reading the gothic magna Godchild. After a couple of hours, my grief quietly changed because I allowed it in.

This morning, I woke up to beautiful blue sky and wispy clouds. My heart smiled. That's not to say I still don't miss my Sean. I do. I can enjoy the day because I let myself feel all my feelings.

I know everyone has issues they struggle with. A key to helping cope with life is Expression!! Seriously, because smothering down our feelings cause depression, repression and any other thing you want to attach to it. How do you express yourself? You paint, write, draw, act, cook, bake, craft, dance, read, etc. Let it flow channeled into healthy things you love to do. Those feelings need freedom!! Only you can let them out.

I have been swimming with the idea of creating a acting class. One that really helps people to free themselves. A key to being an good actor or in any field is to have a full bodied expression in our lives. As Obi wan would say "You must unlearn what you have learned." A lot of stuff we carry are from other people: rules, behaviors, thoughts. We need to revolutionize our minds!

I could talk about this all day. I have errands I must do. I'm going to leave you with my Hugh Jackman; He is going to show you how to start off your day. As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Touch of Melancholy

Today my mind is lost in mists of time and memories. It is a foggy day in The Bronx which fits my melancholy mood. I long for a velvet chocolate cloak to wear. I can don it and wander my local Park, where I can be with my thoughts..


Think on precious friends hid in death's dateless night,. Try to deal with my grief and recall sweet memories. And say But if the while I think on thee, dear friend, All losses are restored and sorrows end.For only Shakespeare can write as eloquently, as I feel today.

There are times when I walk around. I can feel someone next to me and even reaching out to hold my hand. Though I can't see him, I know Sean is still with me. Today, I'm remembering. Sometimes it makes me sad and other times happy. That is way of grief. To be authentic, I must allow the sadness to come in. This feeling will not stay forever; It just needs to be expressed.

I wish for all you sunshine and sweet dreams.

PS. Second picture comes from intergrata.com; I did pretty it up all on my own.

Falling in Love

I always had a romantic soul. It's just the way I am. As I grew, I found myself falling in love not with just people. I fall in love with poems, flowers, places, clothes, colors and movies. It's no surprise to me that I've fallen in love with another movie. The twist for me it's a movie I've seen before. Usually a movie captures my heart at first viewing.

Last week, I decided to watch Sleepy Hollow on Showtime. I saw it when it first came out. I enjoyed the movie. I love Johnny Depp; Christina Ricci is a fab actress. Still, the movie didn't grab me. My twin and her daughter love the movie. Each time it came on cable, I missed it. Finally, I saw it again. I was enchanted.

Why would Sleepy Hollow connect with me now? I'm not sure. Perhaps it's the magical dreaminess of the movie or the fact I have been to Sleepy Hollow which isn't that far away from me. Could it the misty gray shots in the forest and in the village? The beautiful clothes Katrina (Christina Ricci) wears; Or the sweetness of the relationship between Ichabod (Johnny Depp) and Katrina. Even how death is portrayed right along side life with brutal artistry. I'm sure I can muse on this for a while. It speaks to me right now and comforts me. Maybe that's what most important. If you like to share with me what have you fallen in love with recently, please do. I love to hear.

As always, sweet dreams.

P.S .I'm glad you all enjoyed the pictures around Union Square. I'm going to be bringing my camera with me when I walk about. Take pictures of my favorite haunts in the city to share. Hopefully, it will help me take better pictures.

A beautiful day and awards

It was a beautiful day in city. The sun shining and the smell of Spring in the air. I met up Ali with at B&N at Union Square.

Union Square is one of my favorite places in Manhattan. For me it's the point when the hustle and straight laced vibe of midtown melts into the funky bohemian feeling of lower Manhattan. Ali and I went on walking tour. I love walking tours and this one was free! (Even better.) It was a tour of Union Square. As much as I love the place, I know little about it's history. The tour was good and I got to learn a lot about one of my favorite spots in the city. I wanted to share pictures I took today. Please be aware, I'm still learning the ways of taking good photos.

I saw this beautiful door of a townhouse around 8th avenue. I imagine if you went inside you would be greeted by a gracious lady. She invite you in for tea and scones with clotted cream. (I do love clotted cream.)


This was taken in Barnes and Nobles. When I looked up from reading, who was there was my new friend Emily Dickinson. I had to take this shot.


This is the house of the author Washington Irving; It's on the street named after him called Irving Place. I especially love the window.


And now,..drumroll please. I was gifted with this lovely Tripleblog award from Beverly. Thank you Beverly. I'm trying to get better about passing blog awards on.

Here are the rules:
1. Put the logo on your blog or post.
2. Nominate 10 blogs which show great Attitude and/or Gratitude.(If you don't have 10, its OK.)3. Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.
4. Let them know they have received this award by commenting on their blog.
5. Share the love and link to this post and to the person from whom you received your award.

It's really hard to pick. So I'm going to use my Jedi skills to help me pick. Here goes..( Yes, I did say Jedi skills!!)I'm going to choose five. Three of them are new blog friends that I met in the past month.

Jess of Pecanoot
Joelle of Joelle Dolce Bebe
Nicole of A little Mouse Said...
Poetic Dreams of Lil Love Creations
Jennlui of A Trinket Treasure

If you don't know these bloggers, go on over and check them out. Tell them Shell said you. Before I go, I wanted to say a big hi and hug to some of my new fellow Dreamers! I'm up to 28 "official" dreamers. I'm seriously blown away by that number. I know there are more out there who come by and not on the official list. Whichever way you come to Swanofdreamers, I'm happy you come here! All of a good heart and boundless imagination are welcomed. Please if you have been lurking for a bit, come and say hi. I love to hear from you.

As always, Sweet Dreams to you all.

Dreaming of Spring

Thank you all for the love on my audiopost! You all give me the energy and confidence to go on with it. Judy, I just read a few of Sara Teasdale's poems and really loved them. I'm going to include her on the next audiopost. If anyone has suggestions of poets or pages from novels you want me to read, please just let me know in comments or e-mail me. Also, I'm trying to figure out a how to do a video with me acting out a few poems. I want it to be something like this video with Matthew Macfadyen from Pride and Prejudice fame.

Though it's a lovely gray day in The Bronx. I dream of sunshine..


A secret garden where I can wander in.


Feel the sunshine kiss my skin.


Watch the clouds sail the endless blue.


Have a wonderful Friday, everyone. Though we are still in Winter, keep dreaming about Spring. It is almost here! As always, sweet dreams to you all.

Phillis and Emily

Happy March! Even though it's cold here in The Bronx, I am dreaming of Spring. Finally, I have another audio post. This one has the poetry of the first African American female published poet, Phillis Wheatley and my old friend, Emily Dickinson. I am reading the poems: On Being Brought from Africa to America and A Hymn to The Evening by Phillis; also, I taste a liquor never brewed and Adrift! A little boat adrift by Emily.

Please be aware that the text I'm reading Emily from may be slightly different from the links to her poetry. I don't know why editors feel the need to edit her work! Even the version I have does not have Emily's dashes which I love. So eventually I want to get her poetry with her dashes left intact. Also, Phillis isn't the first African American poet as I stated in the video. (I just discovered this today!) That honor goes to Jupiter Hammond; nevertheless, she is still the first sistah poet to be published in this country.

I hope you all enjoy. Please send me requests of poetry or prose you like to be read. I am happy to do so. As always, sweet dreams to you all.


PS. My last audiopost was lost when I changed my youtube account. I'm going to go back and redo it.